Issue #13 “New Year’s Resolutions that Last…2nd Edition”

You may achieve what you want simply by wishing, but you’ll probably increase the possibility by being proactive.

New Year’s resolutions are a cultural tradition, which is often a fun and entertaining way to share with friends, family and others about our future hopes, dreams, and wishes. In many cases we take them about as seriously as we would a fortune cookie, wishing well, birthday cake wish, or daily horoscope.

If your object for your New Year’s resolutions is primarily lighthearted amusement, I think that is great! Sometimes casually throwing a wish out there and forgetting about it can be a powerful way for certain types of wishes to manifest. If this is your intention, I wish you a lot of fun on New Year’s Eve and you can probably stop reading at this point.

On the other hand, if you are a little more intent on making some changes in your life this year, please keep reading. Some of this maybe helpful to make your New Year’s resolutions last.

12-steps for New Years Resolutions that Last

Step#1 Accepting What is…
The quickest way for your life to transform is acceptance! Often a lot of our energy goes towards fighting the way our life is. We imagine that if we accept our life, particularly the parts we don’t like, we will be stuck forever! The truth is our resistance to how our life is at this moment is usually the primary way we keep change from happening. When you can accept this is how things are at this moment, then you are in harmony with reality and often a sense of peace will come over you. Life circumstances will often change quickly and favorably when you are able to accept the moment just as it is. The first step in the creative process is to accept the way things are.

Short Cut: If you can learn to love what ever shows up in your life, you can skip the next 11 steps. When you want what you have and are truly grateful for your life, you will evoke one of the most powerful universal laws. A life that is better than you could have ever dreamed will manifest. Most of us aren’t at this place yet and since you can’t fool your soul, God or the universe by pretending, you will probably need the next 11 steps. A great personal goal or project for the year would be to learn to “love what is,” and if you were able to accomplish this, then you wouldn’t need the steps anymore.

Step#2 Initial Wishing and Dreaming
This part is fairly simplistic and fun. Open your mind, heart, and imagination to what you would wish for and what you would like to have. At this point don’t worry about practicality or being realistic. Instead, simply write down on a piece of paper whatever comes to mind.

Step #3 Listen to your Heart and Soul
Once you have done some initial dreaming and wishing, I would then recommend turning to some sort of prayer, mediation, or other spiritual practice to get clear on what you truly want from your heart. This is where we want to weed out the wishes that don’t call to our whole being. What we are left with are the wishes and dreams that are worth pursuing. They are in alignment with our highest good, which is in alignment with God’s will and the highest good for everyone.

Step #4 Start with One Primary Project
In the beginning it is best to work on one goal or project at a time. Often if you have too many projects at once, you may become scattered, overwhelmed, and ineffective. It is important to remember that you probably already have a lot on your plate. Efficiency, clarity, and confidence in creating come with time and experience. At this point it becomes much easier to manage multiple projects at the same time.

Step #5 Creating a Project and Vision
Creating a project can be very easy. First pick a name for your project, for example, “The Break up.” “I am sorry, cigarettes, you have been a reliable friend, but I have found a new best friend and addiction to replace you: breathing in fresh mountain air.”

Then write the name of your project on a folder. This is a place to keep information about your project, your vision, goals, action plans, and anything else pertaining to your project.

Vision
This doesn’t have to be long. Often a paragraph or two is all you need. The idea is to create a description of your life from the future where you have already accomplished your goal. For example, if it is being in a relationship, you would write about it as if you were already in the relationship. Let your writing be as descriptive as possible about what it is like. Ideally you will be creating pictures in your mind with your words. If you like, you can draw a picture that represents the vision or create a collage from magazine cut outs that creates a picture in a way that inspires you.

Step #6 Finding Support
This is a very important step! Please create a system of support that helps keep you in your project and moving forward. This can be as simple as having a friend who agrees to be your support person. I have found it to be very helpful to have a support person with whom I have weekly conversations about how my project is going. I also like to set weekly goals for my project that I can report back to them about my progress at the end of the week.

How to pick your support person?
Pick someone who is loving, wise, optimistic and gets who you are. If they have a great sense of humor, that is a bonus. I would not recommend someone who will shame you or make you feel bad if you haven’t met a goal or action. Some people may prefer to pick a professional Life Coach to help them with their project.

Step #7 Goals and Taking Action
This can seem scary, but doesn’t have to be. I would recommend setting goals and actions that are comfortable for you and also sometimes a little outside your comfort zone. Often setting one or two small goals a week is all you need to do. These are good things to discuss with your support person.
Often in projects people have a tendency to put out a lot of energy early while they are excited and then very little after that. Most projects are more like a marathon, so pace yourself and be consistent with your goals and actions for the long haul.

Important: If you don’t meet a goal or accomplish an action, you are not bad! Simply come up with a new plan. Nobody in a project meets every goal; it is part of the process. Simply set a new goal and move on. Please be kind to yourself in this process!!!

Step #8 The Honey Moon is Over
The process of creating will likely bring up some of your unhealed stuff. You may want to find someone who can help you work through this. Please remember that our stuff coming up is a blessing. It is giving us a chance to have what we want by removing what is in our way.

Step#9 Persistence, Patience and Faith
Set backs, disappointments and challenges are a part of any project. Colonel Sanders got over three thousand no’s before he got a yes to sell his Fried Chicken, which later led to him opening KFC. Often people give up and think something is impossible way too early. This is when a great support person can come in really handy. You need a person who can still see possibility when you feel defeated.

Note: If you have picked a goal that is truly from your hearts desire, it is much easier to find the strength, courage, and perseverance to keep going in challenging times.

Step #10 God can Dream a Bigger Dream
In essence you are co-creating with God. Realize that your dream (project) is bigger than just you and God may have some say in the direction as well. It is a really good idea to get to a place to hear guidance from the divine on a weekly basis.

Sometime where you start out in a project and where you end up can be very different places. Columbus wouldn’t have found America if he didn’t set sail for India. Sometimes what we think we want is a breadcrumb that leads us to what we really want.

Sometimes we think we have to do everything to make our project happen. The truth is there is an active (doing) and receptive (being) side to the universe. In essence one of the hardest things for most human beings is to allow their creation to be born, rather than just trying to make it happen. When you allow your creation to be born, you give God a chance to participate in co-creating with you and unexpected opportunities and doors can be opened for you.
Remember this isn’t just your dream and God may want to dream an even bigger dream for you than you had first imagined. Colonel Sanders was a senior citizen who just wanted to be able to make his mortgage payments by selling his chicken recipes to local restaurants. God’s dream for him was much bigger! You just never know where your dream will take you…and that is part of the real fun!

Step#11 The Inner Journey
The real journey is our soul’s spiritual growth and evolution. In our world getting to the goal seems like the most important thing. In the spiritual world often the most important thing is the steps we take to get to the goal and how that forwards our spiritual evolution. The journey getting there is at least every bit as important as when we accomplish our goal!!!

Step #12 Having Fun!
Sometimes we are so serious and focused trying to attain our goal that we forget to have fun! The best projects are ones that we can enjoy the journey as much as the destination. Have fun! It is only life after all and in the bigger scope of things nothing is ultimately that important! Well, accept maybe to love! Please remember to put the people in your life ahead of the results!

Pitfalls

Figuring it out
You don’t need to have everything figured out before you start. You will learn as you go and the longer you stay in your project the more you will discover and learn what you didn’t know. At some point in the project synchronicities tend to fall into place at just the right time.

Set Backs
Set backs are a natural part of the process. Have Faith!

Impatience
Most projects take longer to actualize then we would have thought!

Thank you for reading my newsletter!
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Happy New Year!

With Love,

Hugo Elfinstone